I’m in the middle of training for the Indianapolis mini-marathon. No, not a full marathon. A mini one – just 13.1 miles. But plenty far I think.
During law school I had a couple friends who ran marathons, and then and there I decided I should do the same thing. Law school had pushed my brain as far as it would go. A marathon would push my body as far as it could go. This from the girl who HATES to sweat.
Then life happened. I got pregnant. Last semester of law school while working full time with a baby. We moved. I got pregnant. Even less time and inclination to run. Then we got a treadmill. Then I put off running because I wanted to get pregnant. Then after a year, my husband and I got tickets to run the mini together. Then I got pregnant. Then I miscarried. And then I started running. And running. And running. Nights like tonight, I’m not even sure what I’m running from or to. I’m just running.
Now my husband’s got a pinching pain in his lower back and hasn’t been able to train in two weeks. I may be running this on my own. And I don’t want to. Why? I’m afraid I won’t finish. It’s easier to stop now than to keep running without accountability.
Isn’t that like our lives?
We spend so much time running from or to we don’t even know what. And then when we get close to the destination we stop. Paralyzed that something will go wrong.
So much of my life right now is outside my control. I’m writing which is a very capricious business. I’m homeschooling. And I’m training for this crazy mini-marathon. And this control-freak can’t control anything other than my response.
So I chose to do what the Psalmist said: I delight to do YOUR will, Oh God. And I’ll put one foot in front of the other, day after day, step after step, mile after mile. Knowing that God has it all in control, and that’s enough for today.
UPDATE: I ran nine miles Friday night and Eric ran nine miles Sunday night, so we just might be able to do this together after all!