You Know You're in Nebraska when...

According to Jeff Foxworthy (and experience) you know you're in Nebraska if:

• If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May .....you live in Nebraska.
• If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't work there .... you live in Nebraska.
• If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time .... you live in Nebraska.
• If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed awrong number .... you live in Nebraska.
• If "Vacation" means going anywhere south of GRAND ISLAND for the weekend ...you live in Nebraska.
• If you measure distance in squares of farm land ..... you live in Nebraska.
• If you know several people who have hit a cow more than once .... you live in Nebraska.
• If you have gone from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back again ...you live in Nebraska.
• If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching ..... you live in Nebraska.
• If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked .... you live in Nebraska.
• If you carry jumpers in your car and your wife knows how to use them ... you live in Nebraska.
• If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit .... you live in Nebraska.
• If the I-80 speed limit is 75 mph -- you're going 90 and everybody is passing you .... you live in Nebraska.
• If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow... you live in Nebraska.
• If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and roadconstruction .... you live in Nebraska.
• If you have more hours on your snow blower than miles on your car .... you live in Nebraska.
• If you find 10 degrees "a little chilly" .... you live in Nebraska.