Do you ever go through periods in your life when things just don’t go like you’d expected or hoped? Many of you are probably saying, “Of course!”
I’ve always thought of the Christian walk as a series of hills and valleys. Some days I stand on a mountaintop, so near to the heart of God I can feel His presence slip around me, like Moses when God tucked him in the cleft of the mountain. Other days, I’m walking a valley, trudging until I can reach another mountain to climb. I’ve always comforted myself that when you visit the mountains, it’s easy to see growth occurs everywhere but the top.
After the last month, I’m not so sure. I went through a period (one that’s really not over yet) where God did amazing things in one area of my life and seemed to have completely abandoned me in another.
Now I know He didn’t. In fact, I can see His fingerprints all over the one situation even as my heart shattered. And His presence and direction were so evident in the other that there was no doubt He was leading me.
I have never experienced such painful and exhilarating periods simultaneously. And I have to be honest – I really, truly, down-to-the-very-core-of-my-soul don’t ever want to again.
Then I read a quote that is attributed to Rick Warren. You may have seen it too. He talks about thinking life was hills followed by valleys followed by hills. Then he experienced a period of immense pleasure and pain simultaneously. That’s when he realized life is really about learning to live the good and the bad at the same time.
I’m not sure how I feel about that. I liked my charmed Christian life. But I also want the fullness of what God has for me. I don’t have all (or many) answers, but I do know this. I will crawl and dance across the floor to His throne. And sometimes, I may just do both on the same day.
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And don't forget to check out this week's post over at Generation NeXt Parenting.
3 comments:
On the day after the year anniversary of one of the most excruciating days of my life, I can honestly say I understand. I also say that I never, ever want to be there again and I can't believe I'm going to say this in public, but my fear is that God is preparing me for something worse. :(
I hate that thought and I want to make it go away.
I know exactly what you're saying! It's hard not to live looking over our shoulders for the next thing to drop. Yet when I look at the sume of my existence, I can see God's hand and faithfulness so clearly. I need to trust Him to continue to be like He has been -- especially since we know He can't change.
Late last year--November--I went through one of the worst times of my life. The most amazing thing was how God met me at my lowest point. When it looked like I would be starting over--by myself. That's when I saw Him. That experience made me realize that I know that I know that I know He was there. He is there now. He will always be there. No matter what. (Hope that doesn't sound super spiritual. Believe me, I'm not. :-) )
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